What the Doctor really means |
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What the Doctor says |
What the Doctor really means |
| "This won't hurt a bit." | "It will hurt a lot." |
| "This should be taken care of right away." | "I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next
month but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures
itself." |
| "Welllllll, what have we here..." | Since he hasn't the foggiest notion of what
it is, the Doctor is hoping you will give him a clue. |
| "We'll see." | "First I have to check my malpractice
insurance." |
| "Why don't we make another appointment later in the week." | "I'm playing golf this afternoon" |
| "Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm." | Since he hasn't the faintest idea of what
to do, he is trying to appear thoughtful while hoping the nurse will interrupt.
(Proctologists also say this a lot.) |
| "We have some good news and some bad news." | The good news is he's going to buy that new BMW, and the bad news is you're going to pay for it. |
| "That's quite a nasty looking wound." | "I think I'm going to throw up." |