The Lighter Side of Ophthalmology

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Erap's Medical Dictionary

Artery............................the study of paintings
Bacteria....................the back door of a cafeteria
Barium.................what doctors do when patients die
Bowel.....................a letter like a, e, i, o, or u
Caesarean Section.................a neighborhood in Rome
Cat Scan.............................searching for kitty
Cauterize..................made eye contact with Hillary
Colic................................a kind of sheep dog
D & C...........................where the White House is
Dilate...............................to live a long time
Enema.......................................not a friend
Genital.......................................not Jewish
G.I. Series..........................a soldier ball game
Hangnail.......................................coat hook
Impotent.......................distinguished, well-known
Labor Pain..........................getting hurt at work
Medical Staff............................a doctor's cane
Morbid....................................a higher offer
Nitrates..........................cheaper than day rates
Node........................................was aware of
Outpatient..........................a person who fainted
Pap Smear..............................a fatherhood test
Pelvis............................Elvis Presley's cousin
Post-operative..........................a letter carrier
Recovery Room...................a place to do upholstery
Rectum..............................damn near killed 'em
Seizure....................................Roman Emperor
Tablet.....................................a small table
Terminal Illness..................................D.I.A.
Tumor......................................more than one
Urine.............................opposite of you're out
Varicose..........................................nearby
Vein...........................................conceited